Slow and Cold

The Two thousand and nineteen ride season got off to a start finally on a rather short and pathetic ride in the Old Timers area. The motivation to ride right now is at an all time low and getting out was a miracle in itself. Listening to Joe Rogan interview a motivational speaker ex U.S Navy Seal should have been enough cannon fodder to get me out in the cold but I sat in the parking lot coming up with a myriad of excuses to just go home.

Luckily I have Instagram and I typed in "fitness motivation" on the search bar and soon I was overwhelmed with douchebag, drugged up millenials at the gym posting ass shots in front of the mirror.

That was all the motivation I needed to ride today and I was soon on my bike ripping those trails! Thanks to all the fitness motivation posters of Instagram. You really are changing the world.

Trails are fine. Some slick spots which catch you by surprise but nothing too sketchy. Fresh snow was de-virginized by my big tires which was the highlight of the day. The bike was top notch after I successfully bled my brakes after a few pathetically failed attempts.

The ride was under the Lonebiker 8km minimum but seeing the lack of activity on here, I had too. Besides, there is nothing like breaking fresh snow on a fatbike kids!

Beer Friday. Wild Rose Brewery. WR 4 Oat Pale Ale

Oh hey... How are ya? It's been a rather frustrating start to the days off as I had two rides where the towel was thrown in due to not being quite prepared. Today was a classic case of not caring as I drove all the way to Old Timers to start a ride and realized my tire was beyond low and had nothing to fill it so I could have been on my way. What's that you say? Why didn't you go to Hardcore and get it filled up there? I could of, the issue is I just didn't care about riding and this attitude is becoming more concerning.

Blame my work as I am now out of town quite a bit and when gone riding bikes and living large is far from my mind. When I do get home there are other more important things to take care of and sadly riding gets kicked to the curb.

Is the end near for riding? Hell no, I will never stop. Sadly I will be out a lot less, which was the theme last year and I know that trend will only continue. I have an incredibly good job in very hard times in the best province in the country. Which coming from one in the trades I know how lucky I am.

This is why we have Wild Rose brewing from Calgary this review. A good local craft beer brewer in the province. Their WR 4 Pale Ale which is adorned with the Alberta flag makes me cry whenever I look at it. I love Alberta more than life, Sadly it has a bad reputation in due to a number of redneck hillbilly sheep fuckers that reside here.

When we opened this beer Ian Tyson's 'Springtime in Alberta' started playing and we all cried and held each other.

Alberta is hurting right now. She will get back on her feet soon kids.

We poured and a light but dirty beer showed itself capped with a good solid four fingered head that would not leave no matter how much coaxing we tried. I even offered it a free membership to the Lonebiker Ride of the month club and it didn't budge. A fruity citrus door was strong and it made me wonder if I should use this to clean the dash of my Jeep. This one smelled delicious!

The first sip was as expected. quite full of citrus amongst other flavours. A creamy and rich taste once you get past that head that will not go away. That is seriously one determined beer froth! Other notes include lemon peel, grapefruit and anything else remotely citrus. This one is very good. Go get some, it would be perfect for a fine summer barbecue (then again, what beer wouldn't?)

This one does scream summer barbecue. I know it's January.

This beer gets 4 suds out of 5.

Happy Tuesday

Happy Sunday

Beer Friday. Granville Island, Mocha Porter

The first Beer Friday of a new year always makes one a happy contempt person. That is the ones who are into the blogging beer reviews. So how about the ones that are into the bike riding and post bike ride blogging? That shit won't be happening. Home from work and facing a slight touch of the flu has things in dire circumstances. With a possible early return to work this short week home will most likely be bikeless.  Which honestly is pretty depressing to think of. Thank God there is beer.

Too sick to ride but good enough to review beer. I guess things could be worse. Granville Island has been on here in the past. This British Columbia brewery has been in operation since nineteen eighty four. The same time I had discovered Mary Anne from Gilligan's Island. A perfect women who does it all and has the charming personality to make an eight year old Lonebikers heart flutter. Not like that bitch Ginger!

We poured and a little bit too much head formed on a dark American Porter. It wasn't the beer it was the pour that was at fault. I quickly performed a roundhouse kick to the one responsible and he left the room and made straight for the hospital. The head stood on top of this one for some time making me nervous. Slowly it whittled down and a first sip was had. The alcohol seemed to warm you up the way a puppy does when it wants to sleep on you on the couch. Definitely strong coffee is in the taste as well, dark chocolate and anything else that is good and dark. This is an easy drinking beer that one would want on a January night while reading a novel and eating leftover Christmas snacks.

This beer gets 3.5 suds out of 5.

Top 5 Rides of Eighteen

#5 Fort Saskatchewan in the Fall, bitches

A long awaited meet up with Gord which had the Gord factor push this into the top 5. Conditions were ok. A little slick in spots, otherwise it was good to go. I got lucky with some good pics and we got lucky with some good old Ft Sask singletrack.


#4 Singlecrack is life

Referencing heavy drug use with riding bikes could not make me any happier. This one brought on that drug feeling which almost forced me into just staying in the valley and living there. I didn't, I went home.



#3  Another Staff College Start (eye roll)

Ahhhh...The Staff College starts. A two-eighteen phenomenon? Possibly now with Cameron Heights having a trail so you can avoid the paved. This one was one of those spring is here, break out the nice bikes rides. The only ride fail? A bad turn on Selkirk and suddenly I was surrounded by strollers and angry moms.

#2 fat Tire Redemption

Its cause of days like this I will never sell my fat bike.Choppy loose snow made it challenging for sure but I knew I would be nowhere near I was on a normal bike. A visit to my old lady Victoria was a must and fireworks were ignited.

#1 Under the Bridge (a music themed ride)

The ride of the year, have to admit it was very hard to choose one and formulate this list. Kent was there and the nostalgic visit to Whitemud park took me back to nineteen ninety three!

Worst Rides of Two Thousand & Eighteen

Still better than the couch, worst rides of the year posted on LB. Best rides of the year coming on New Years.

Blowout at the 3.65km Mark

I worked too much this year.. This shit happens. Probably sadly going to be the theme in 19 too.


The Joby Chase!

losing stuff isn't cool. Luckily I found it where I left it. My Joby camera tripod. That would have been so sad. An exclamation point on the title is win win though. Right kids?


4.2 on 42?

A failed birthday ride. Seems to be an annual event now with the exception of my 41'st. Thanks Gord and Kent for the only successful birthday ride ever.

Happy Thursday

Terwillegar. Land of the Whites

A slow and easy paced roll from Staff College (well one of us started there) through Terwillegar's dark and seedy underbelly on through Oliskew's trails. Dark and seedy underbelly you ask? By dark and seedy I'm talking about good looking white people walking around holding a full Starbucks cup while having deep conversations about what kind of a return they are getting on their G.I.C contributions as of late.  Their BMW's, Audi's and countless SUV's wait in the parking lot.

Damn, that's some fuckin scary shit...

That's some scary shit right there. People were brave enough to come with me and go out into this sketchy area of Edmonton when Jason, Kent and Kent's fine lady Zara showed up. Zara debuted on here last year on this ride click link. "Oh my God! It's a dog behaving incredibly good as it heeled to it's owner when we came along! Run for you lives!" My brain kept telling me to yell but I didn't.

As per the usual lonebiker brethren rides, great company. Zara being still somewhat new to the trails (to fatbikes now) is always impressive as it would seem that absolutely nothing phases her. The sketchy steeps, the iced climbs. Everything was ridden and owned by Zara. That's why I am standing at my computer at attention and saluting. Godspeed Zara!... Godspeed. The smile is probably the best thing, pure joy the whole ride long.

The trail conditions were top notch. Some ice lurked underneath but didn't throw anyone into the trees. A hell of a fine ride with some top notch company.

Pics. Kent Steeves from top. #3, #8, #9.
         Jason Kirkpatrick  from top #4, #10.

MillCreek Mixer

Short and sweet and kept it all in MillCreek. Parked at the main parking lot and did not exit my little ravine once (although the GPS tracks tell a different story.)

Nothing intended other than keeping it in the ravine. One could do a couple themed rides and stay in MillCreek if you wanted; A MillCreek bridge ride perhaps. Hit every bridge including the ladder bridges. Or ride everything day. Every single trail from the north to the south including MillCreek Millwoods.

I can't say I get too excited at these ideas. Just things I thought of after this one.

Today's conditions. Good. The light snow did cover some iced sections on the singletrack so a heads up. Really nothing that warranted ass puckering today.

Beer Friday. Hop City, Barking Squirrel

Well it’s Christmas week kids and that red old fat bastard is getting ready to hop in his sleigh and travel around the world and hand out treats too all the kids who have been quite the most terrific little shitheads all year. Imagine the joy this Christmas morning at Lonebiker headquarters when old grumpy Lonebiker himself opens up that new anti chaffing cream for those long hot pesky days at work. It's gonna be all nothing but win win kids.

Brampton Ontario you say? Say no more. Home of Hop City brewery which opened in two thousand and nine. Brampton, which is a part of Toronto's overwhelming grasp sits nice and tucked in close to Toronto. Much akin to Beaumont vs Edmonton. The brewery which is run by a couple of fine dudes has five beers always available including ours tonight. The Barking Squirrel which is a red amber didn't attract much attention from the interns when we started. Maybe the pour will wake them up.

We poured and a red liquid filled the beer tester stein much to the delight of the once aloof interns. The two and three quartered head stood proud but eventually was reduced to a quarter finger. The first  sip? A nice blend of white toffee, and caramel. The low-medium carbonation made the rest of this one go down just fine. Only complaints? Honestly can't find anything notable. This one would be in my regular lineup if they were affordable and easily available.

This beer gets 4 suds out of 5.

Happy Sunday

Beer on a Monday Afternoon. McAusian Brewing, St-Ambroise Érable

After a shitty few days of lack of riding it looked like today was going to be my redemption. It all started when a ride on Saturday came to a screeching halt after my derailleur cable had finally taken itself up upon the sweet path of death. What was shaping up to be a great ride and subsequently a ride on Sunday with a long lost brethren member turned into nothing. An attempt by myself to change the cable proved to be the disaster I had expected.

I suck at fixing bikes.. Been 20 something years and many attempts in vain.

The failed brake bleeds.

The failed derailleur adjustments.

The half ass "big bike cleans" that always warranted some sort of mechanical issue in where a wheel will go flying across my basement and crashing into a wall followed by some enraged yelling.

So with Kent throwing his cape on I had the bike over at his place and I watched in Gobsmacked fashion as he fixed the problems I made and had the bike running properly within an hour.

Today was designated ride day. All was great until I went outside after not believing the weather network phone app calling for freezing rain and finding it raining cats and dogs (I'm so sorry p.e.t.a) so I sat threw the idea of riding out.

So I stayed home safe and sound and started cleaning up to impress the chick I live with. (typed with Rayban sunglasses on.) The cleanup ended once I saw the St-Ambroise Érable peering out from the back of the fridge I knew what was happening. The clean up was suddenly replaced by some good old classic Monday afternoon boozing brought you you by freezing rain!

I poured (cause I was all by myself) and it gave me (the photographer, again cause I was all by myself) a beautiful image of a darkened festive beer that will pick up my biking blue ball spirits. A two fingered head cause of the perfect pour (it was all me baby) pandemonium from the small crowd of people that had formed in my room once they heard a beer review was going down.

The first sip was met with a hard motherfucker of a bitch slap across the face full of Canadiana. Hell ya Quebec! You know how to brew a good Canadian craft beer. A strong but tolerable showing of maple with the usual suspects in a good craft beer, Caramel, toffee, brown sugar and some delectable earthy hops. I can call this a Christmas beer as it seems to have everything when you shut your eyes, sip and fantasize. Yep, that red suited fat bastard is right beside me doing jello shots.

This beer gets 4 suds out of 5.

Fat Tire Redemption

After bitching incessantly last set of days off about fat bikes pretty much being useless it appears the Winter Gods overheard and gave a powerful Winter blast to the Edmonton area. None of this is news to you if your local but for the ones who come here from out of the province the snow fell pretty hard last weekend when I was away for work.

The Instagram posts got me excited for my return and the snow did no disappoint. The start from Old Timers into the Old Timer trail systems had things packed down reasonably well. I stayed away from Gnome trail and took the regular trails to the mighty Dudley B Menzies bridge and crossed and punished myself on the paved as I rode the stretch of River Valley Road.

I finally got retribution and climbed (walked) up the side of the former museum and soon found myself on Lovers Trail? Is that the name? I thought it was Groat Road Rollercoaster? When did the name change and why do we have to name every single trail in the the river valley? *intern leans in "it's probably so people can identify trails to ride and communicate that to others..."

Ahh.. Fair enough. Makes complete sense. But why the constant name changes?

I did fire that intern immediately.

The trails on Lovers Trail or whatever it's called were a tad rough due to lack of traffic. It was rideable for the most part but the steep climbs were quite challenging. A few other fat bikes were on it before just not enough to really pack things down.

The same can be said for Victorias Secret. Lots of loose snow which if not careful can really toss you around. The big tires proved their weight in gold on the trails and instantly today I regretted all the bad things I said about fat bikes.

My bike ruled the roost today and it was pure joy.

If your on the fence on getting a fat bike make yourself a way to get one. It won't be a winner everyday but is still fun to ride and when it is extra spicy on the snow front. They are more fun than seven midget hookers, a slingshot, and a pound of cocaine.

Beer Friday. Alley Kat, Buena Vista Brown Ale

A beer review instead of a bike ride write up? I guess we will let that happen. A bike ride failure was the order of the day after a flat tire with no spare tubes and not even a patch kit sent things into a panic this morning over at lonebiker headquarters. A flat tire you say?  No big deal bro! By the time I got a kit and was back repairing things were too late as a hot date Was in the cards later today.

Today’s local brew from Ally Kat was picked up wih a renewed sense of excitement. It’s been a while since Ally Kat has been on here and seeing this one perched up in the confines of the cool rack’ of the local beer store. You know that area. The area in the beer cooler where the hipsters hang out.

We poured this one into the Hardcore mug and it showed off its darkened colour. A short half fingered head stood up top trying to intimidate the masses but sadly had no affect. This one had a smell of toffee and malted hops which invited our eager palates to the beer review table. Ivan, the lead sniffer on Lonebiker.com took a whiff and was pleasantly surprised. This has all the attributes of a true craft beer.

We tasted it and our mouths gave us a nice feel of toffee and peanut brittle. A warm touch of freshly baked bread and earthy hops were present. A tad watered down some could say but that seems to be the case in most beers like this. Is that just the way it is in brown ale craft beer world? I think so.

In the end, a pleasant one that will serve you well on a cold evening.

This beer gets 3.5 suds out of 5.