Sunday, February 16, 2020

Pulmonary Archery




Best ride of the year thus far hands down. A big thank you to Mrs Lonebiker for pushing me out the door for a late roll through the Hawerlak area from Kinseman. I was hurting from Kent's meet-up yesterday  and was moping around the house. I had told her I planned on a ride this evening but then passed on it from the soreness. The idea of going out to dinner and then coming home to do nothing had my dumb brain in an excited fervour.

I knew she was right, so I went.

Everything seemed to click well tonight. It was one of those rides where things flowed as gracefully as Jesus pouring wine to the gentiles he just made from a dead porpoise (that happened right?) Well I am lying a bit. Raygun had me all over the trail in areas. A small path was there but once you kicked out to the sides trouble was brewing quickly.

The highlight was probably Raygun in the dark. A first for me. It was an invigorating feeling as I rolled through. An army of mini vans and SUV's were somewhat visible at times in Hawerlak down below through the scattered trees for the Silver Skate Festival taking place. I shuddered when I thought about the crowds.

The other highlight was Raven and the epic Winter wonderland scenery I was rolling through in the dusk light. Trying to describe that feeling is impossible and at that moment I felt sorry for people who don't get out and ride bikes.

It really is soul changing at times, I don't care how cheesy that sounds. Riding bikes fucking rules. There seriously is nothing better than what we do kids.




Saturday, February 15, 2020

Happiness by the Kilowatt







 A meet with mr Steeves at his finer Terwillegar palace on a splendid Saturday for a ride in the snow on a couple of 907 wonder bikes.

I had tossed the idea in my head afterwards of starting a cool 907 club. I do remember at one time there were 907 bikes everywhere but with less shops selling them the sightings in the valley have dwindled down significantly. A perfect opportunity to start a 907 bike club!

*Intern leans in nervously... "Umm sir, if you start a club you will have to meet new people and ride with them and possibly create more friendships which means less alone time on the bike and less alone time on days off."

Ahh.. Well fuck eh. Maybe the club will be restricted to brethren members only.

*Intern leans in again... "The other two only ride Treks."

"Well what the hell is wrong with them!?" I exclaimed with heavy amounts of saliva coming from my mouth coating the intern in a strange sticky  green goo.

The intern replies swiftly pulling a hanky from his breast pocket to clean up chunks of mucus from his spectacles "Don't know sir. They like what they like I guess. Are you gonna fire me for this?"

"You know the drill. Pack your stuff."

This is a picture heavy post for only a sixteen kilometre ride. The snow today was decent. The fun began on Fireman's and we crossed the bridge into Oliskew and took the log trail and the Flat Pete's. Narrow paths with soft snow on the sides did cause some foot dabs and wipeouts into the fluffy snow. I'm sure most of the carnage was on my end of the riding.

Patricia ravine was ridden on the creek when soon we were on the multi use trails. Temptations to ride Bed Springs arose but we passed by and took the back end into Purgatory. A badass mother fucker of a trail which I haven't ridden much.

The foot dabs were a plenty (once again on my end of course.)

We got out of Purgatory and took the outside paved in Oliskew to Oliskew Meadow where Kent showed me the aftermath of some trashy person on a skidoo that wrecked a good portion of the trail. Fuckin rednecks... I tell ya.

We hit a very busy Terwillegar and rode to Dave's Trail to get some drone footage. Sadly his phone was quite low on batteries so the flight was cancelled. "Phew!" I exclaimed. lives could have been lost!

The ride back. Uneventful. In the end a winner.

God bless Kent's sexy hair.

God bless mountain bikes.

as close as we got to go trail, so tempting
some people truly suck at dog ownership
Ken Steeves. Pics 3,4,6 &7.

Friday, February 14, 2020

Beer Valentines. Something Brewing, Gimmie That Nutt Brown Ale


Oh boy. Valentines. After a night out at Earls for a birthday dinner for Lonebiker senior.. Oh wait. That sounds bad. Grandma Lonebiker. Oh shit, that sounds worse! Umm... Lonebiker the great?

Is that good? The amount of guys dressed to the nines armed with flowers at Earls to impress their ladies was quite insane. I know they all had one end game in mind.

Valentines. A day where flower and chocolate shops gouge their customers beyond all means so they can give their sweet significant other a gift which in turn would give the giftee (I call that the one giving the gift) most likely some sort of X rated sexual favour. I mean let's be honest here. That is the very short but truthful story of what Valentines is all about. From heart shaped pizzas to dopey guys over dressed in suits this holiday all comes down to one thing to every guy. And you know what that is..

Have I mentioned that I think this day is quite dumb? Hey, if you love it thats cool... I guess. I did get dumped badly on Valentines one year so maybe that's it.

Enough about Valentines and anything remotely related to it in any way, shape or form.

So here we have Gimmie That Nutt from Something Brewing in Red Deer. A brewery that has made a lot of appearances on here all thanks to a big donation last Summer. We poured and it showed a brown beer that gave us a small one fingered head that hung around and fizzed into a small head that showed small traces of glass lacing as it was downed.

A woodsy and leafy smell with caramel showed the nostrils who's boss. I felt like I was in the woods and they were caramel flavoured! The first sip was what I expected. A taste of chocolate caramel with moderate carbonation. I did get the sense of a watered down beer but upon further tasting I squashed that theory. In the end, a nice earthy beer which can be enjoyed all alone in your studio apartment.

Ha ha ha ha... Happy Valentines kids.

This beer gets 3 suds out of 5.



Thursday, February 13, 2020

Avoiding the Temptation






I think most guys my age have temptations of a different sort than I did today. Not gonna lie and say I am all mighty and holy and never am tempted but todays temptations were of a different nature.

The ride today was merely a stretching of the legs and a return back to normalcy after another work week came to an end. I wanted to just do a short roll through the woods which I did but the allurement of a longer ride on more trails was just as strong as Lana Del Ray standing at the door with the promise of a private jet ride to her home in California to hang out and play Yahtzee.

I wouldn't do that to my wife and I didn't do that to my legs today. It was a short roll from Old Timers to the High Level and across with a return on the north side and Mill Creek. The ride today was quite great. The euphoric feelings of the trees whizzing by as I rode through the snow was quite the start I needed for days off. Especially after a poor ride effort last time I was off which started with such incredible promise.

The snow that fell wreaking havoc on Edmonton roads a few days ago made things a bit challenging as most of the singletrack was stamped down but with a narrow line. That meant very careful steering was needed to avoid getting sucked into the soft powder, I like to think I handled most so whatcha gonna do?

*Edit, my dumb apple computer autocorrected the last sentance. Upon investigation we decided to just leave it as I could not remember what was intended to be typed. So we just left it as this.



Saturday, February 8, 2020

Happy Saturday Eve

The 90's, mountain bikes, and the pixies.. sigh. Right here is four minutes and thirty two seconds of amaze...

Monday, February 3, 2020

Beer Friday. Troubled Monk, Pesky Pig Pale Ale


Well here we are on a Monday evening doing a beer review. My transition from nights to days seems to be on its usual destructive course. I really thought a bike ride to kick things off was a smart idea but as the days went on fatigue and slothfulness set in quite heavily. What are we? Two bike rides in? With today a bust and tomorrow looking the same that might leave this at three rides for the set off. Pretty much par for the course for night recovery. I did have a ride attempt in Fort Saskatchewan which would have probably fixed things but I was dead tired. That and the drop in by the tennis courts showed very little traffic on the trails which had me a bit perplexed... "Was nobody riding Fort Saskatchewan anymore? Or do people all avoid the hard parts and just ride the boat launch westward and back?" I already knew the answer sadly...

That ride was cancelled as I could have fought the snow and rode on but the fatigue had won and I knew that ride was a no go. I did some things in town and stopped at the boat launch to see plenty of fat bike tracks from the parking lot heading west.. Sigh.. "not sure what is wrong with people now.." I mumbled to myself. A post on the local Facebook forums asking why people don't ride from the tennis courts anymore warranted no answers.

Please no... Don't think I'm some sort of hardcore wannabe who is upset cause people don't ride the harder trails. It really isn't that harder than the rest. Maybe a few hike a bike sections take place now but... I mean.. The whole out and back is 15km of relatively easy riding. Why are people cutting that in half now?

I'm sorry. I'm grumpy. Apologies to Troubled Monk as I made their beer review all about me in true millennial form. Shall we just review this one now?

Troubled Monk from Red Deer gets the last review since last Summer when a large tasters flat was delivered as a gift. The pour was nice, a murky golden beer filled the tester glass with a two fingered head that lurked once it was fully dissipated. A nice craft beer smell resonated up the nostrils. Citrus is a notable one with oranges and grapefruit leading the charge.

I sipped and was pleased. This one has the usual craft beer feels as you put this up to the lips and partake. Tastes of citrus not surprisingly hit you. Some leafy goodness hits you as well with the malt delivering in a big way. This is a very nice drinking beer with each sip giving you copious amounts of flavours.

This beer gets 4 suds out of 5.




Sunday, February 2, 2020

This Could be Anywhere in the World





The naming of rides after Alexisonfire songs continues after a roll through the usual stomping grounds of Millcreek and the Ewok area.

Fighting with the post night shift blues and sleeping a good chunk of the day away I knew I had  to ride despite missing the opening quarter or more of the Super Bowl.

I'll be honest here. There is a football game on and I can't focus on writiing this.

Snow and trail conditions are not great despite what I read on social media this morning.. or this afternoom when I wokeup. Lots of potholes and rough spots from people out in the warm weather. I did find things nice and tacky on the short power climbs so thats a plus.


the canoe event getting in the way again for another year 

Pulmonary Archery

Best ride of the year thus far hands down. A big thank you to Mrs Lonebiker for pushing me out the door for a late roll through the...