Saturday, June 15, 2019

Beer Friday. Brewsters, Blue Monk Barley Wine

Happy Saturday kids. Hope the bikes and trails are treating you well. This is now well into my first week of work disability all thanks to a nerve in my back that is sending horrendous shards of pain down my leg.

I hate being this guy..

The horrendous shards of pain have been gone for a week now but there are times when my leg will have one just to remind me that it's there. The experts say two more weeks and I should be fine but they also say be careful going back to work (or bikes.) This could be triggered again if not left to fully heal which could be a long time.

The worst part is being off work. I've never been the 'disability' guy but sadly I have no choice. Just walking to the bathroom first thing in the morning is pure torture. Thankfully I work for an incredibly good company and they will work with me through this bullshit. For now, plastic tank and airplane models are the only thing that keep me busy when I'm not at physio or massages and chiropractors.

So there is the update for the blog and lack of posts. Sorry but no this won't turn into a plastic modelling site if you were hoping.

Brewsters was on here in the beginning or around the beginning and haven't been back since. It is a local brewer/ restaurant that has some pretty decent food. It was established in nineteen eighty nine. back when men were men and the Oilers were a contender. Oh my what a long time ago that was...

The pour, not spectacular yet I was and am always impressed took shape of a bronzed brew with a small head and what looked like will be very little to no lacing (two of my interns are crying right now.) It had the smell of butterscotch mixed with grass clippings (or was that from outside?) Nevertheless it was making me eager to try and that was by scent alone, gotta admit not at all impressed by her looks.

We tasted and were pleasantly surprised. This one has character. Malts and slight toffee hit you right away. It has a pleasant mouth feel, in fact one of the best mouthfeels since the inception of Lonebiker and you can take that to the bank Batman!

Sorry, it doesn't get much to make me excited these days cause I've got not much to do.

This one gets 4 suds out of 5.

Thursday, June 13, 2019

Thursday, June 6, 2019

Beer Friday. Molson, Export

Greetings on a sort of wet evening in the Beaumont area. We are home with a rather serious leg issue. It does seem like I have issues all the time doesn't it? The kind folks at work reminded me of that notion and thinking back it would seem to be every year something comes up.

Do I blame old age? Probably. The issue now is most likely a sciatic issue which means leg pain. Well at times the leg pain was so intense I dropped while on shift at work. Not cool. Did I run back to my camp room like some pussy would though? Hell no! I stayed and did the job most likely injuring myself further and probably taking another year or two off my life. Cause that's what a smart person does! Working with tears in his eyes, injuring himself further making sure nobody sees...

So the good news. Well there isn't any. Other than a beer getting ready for it's time to shine. This newest injury could take a majority of the summer. Ouch.

Molson was established in Canada sometime a long time ago before we started ruling at hockey. Well actually I am pretty sure we ruled at hockey before Molsons and will rule at hockey long after it's gone. I mean.. The Stanley Cup is right now and look how many Canadians are on the teams.  Well, I'm only guessing but I can assume most are Canadian as they always are.

The pour went fine despite our lead pourer going too heavy and creating an unreasonable head. The person involved was immediately fired and sadly that part of the review is now inconsequential. A golden glorious lager awaited. Yes it knew it looked ridiculous with it's large head that was rudely given to him but he stood strong in the face of adversity.

The first sip was very much that of a regular ale. Tastes of light fruit and citrus are there. Things do seem watered down though. Not the fault of the beer, just the fault of the beer type. Or so I think.. This one would be a nice Sunday afternoon beer after you are done mowing the lawn. The grassy hops and earthy tones seem to comply with everything earth.

To close. This isn't an amazing beer by any stretch of the imagination. It is very Canadian and it features (taking a guess here) the Mayflower on the can. This beer has been associated with the Montreal Canadians and Alouettes from as long as I remember. Hell I think the Alouettes had it on their jerseys at one time before the world turned into a bunch of pussies.

This beer gets 2.5 suds out of 5.

Sunday, June 2, 2019

Happy Sunday

A beer review every day this set off?

Sadly there will be zero bike time..

Sunday, May 26, 2019

Beer Friday. Red Bison Brewery, Spur Line.

Welcome back to Beer Friday done properly on a Sunday night. The Sunday night before I leave for work to be exact. Yes I was off and no I didn't ride the bikes all due to a muscle strain in my left leg. If you remember correctly I had the exact same problem with my right leg in the Fall lasted year which put an end to the fun for a couple months. Which I'm sure resulted in a plethora of bitching.

I could go on and bitch on here at how lame this is but I think I'll take on a new attitude this go around. Like I mean.. It's really cool limping everywhere I go when I walk anywhere. What's really going to be swell is the shape I will be in when I'm back after another set with this strain thing only starting! I have the entire Beer Friday beer review team off tonight and they are in a church praying things get better and get better fast. Cause guys. This sucks.

I poured all alone in the pouring pavilion and it was a nice somber change. It was quiet. No executives ordering anyone around. Oh wait... Red Bison. See! All I did was talk about myself there!

Located right in Calgary. Another fine looking craft brewery. Not too sure when they opened as the internet is not telling me jack shit. One thing I did find is a horrible review done by somebody who visited their pub. Which made me wonder, how are these business's protected from this kind of shit? Sure if your a terrible business than you deserve to get destroyed online but to the good ones with people with grudges. I'm sure it all works out in the end.

*waits for people to stop laughing.

So I poured this and a dark ale filled my glass with the hopes and dreams of a Calgary based brewery with one whiny online review would want. It filled the glass with hopes and dreams. All that and topped off with a two fingered orange head that spoke loudly much alike another orange face running things down below.

The first sip was quite nice. A smattering of pine cloves, burn't espresso, caramel malt with a slight touch of pine needle that doesn't come through too strong. Yet it's there. The second taste gave all of the same just on a smaller scale. It's like my taste buds are expecting it which tones down the taste a little bit. No it's not watered down, you'd like to think that wouldn't you? The tastes on the last two thirds of the glass were quite exquisite.  This one left a nice lacing on the glass. Nothing but win win Red Bison.

This beer gets 4.5 suds out of 5.

Thursday, May 23, 2019

Monday, May 13, 2019

Days Off Final Salvo

A fine end to a great set of days off. With the May sun shining I set off on my silver chariot from Old Timers and instead of going right into the trails I hooked it left and went straight to Blue Man group trying to be a badass thinking nobody starts rides this way from old Timers.

Yes I know I’m wrong and unoriginal but it was today’s fantasy moment. You know the type of dream right? Elephant bodied unicorns fly overhead shooting dark rainbow coloured shards of molten steel from their asses as you went the opposite way to start a ride. You know? That kind of dream. That’s normal right?

So anyways... Blue man and then a double fingered “Fuck you!” To the house that some dickhole is building. The Trap and then mid Ewok. Yes... I said “Mid Ewok” I know some trail dorks just scoffed at that lonebiker nonsense. And damnit I do not apolagize.

 A climb up some paved bullshit and a quick rest and I was soon on CaddyShack and Andre’s. Easily some of the best trails in the whole Edmonton area. I tucked my tail and rode across Gretzky bridge (Capilano Bridge for the normies.) and soon found myself up inside Edmonton’s seedy underbelly, I averted some crazies and was downtown where I soon found Walterdale and rode back with Old Timers being the final dirt for the week (Yes, probably ain’t called “old Timers” anymore but that’s what it is in Kennatopia Land. So go eat a dick.)

My.... I’m coming off mighty abrasive this ride chatter. Maybe I’m just grumpy cause I’m gone from this for a week.

Well sheeeit... I think it’s that right there.

Sunday, May 12, 2019

East Side and Out

I forgot how much it takes to build up kilometres while riding real trails. It was a short dip in the valley with intentions of hitting Gold Digger and a couple of the other area trails and leaving.

I rode Gold Digger and then the porno trail and decided Risky Business should end a quick recovery  day ride.

Hey! You know what? I have nothing to say about today's ride. It was great. It was short but just what the trail Gods were calling for. I'm having a serious case of writers block over here so do you mind?

Sorry, see you all tomorrow hopefully.

Saturday, May 11, 2019

Dried Dirt and Mean Streets

It was a decent return back to the bikes after yesterday, a failed bike ride in the Hawerlak region where my legs screamed "no more!"

The ride from Old Timers to the old museum where a climb out and a good old classic out of breath panic attack came full swing while in the trees. My helmet and jock strap was off and everything.

It was pretty awesome.

Once I collected my stuff and my wits I continued on up. Lovers Lane was ridden where lots of other people have apparently discovered this trail. The same trend continued in my lovely lady Victoria’s Secret. People galore!  so instead of staying in the valley I stayed out. Can't blame people. It's Saturday and the weather was epic so everyone is outside.

I decided to ride across downtown and hit the Jasper ave Traverse. I was going to cross the river and hit Caddyshack and Andre's but decided against it due to the sheer number of people out on the trails.  Instead I entered Mill Creek and gave it some love on The Trap and then Blue Man group.

I rode down Dirty Mattress and hit West Coast trail where the ride ended. In the end, another winner.

Yes, the trails are all top notch. Some of the lower usual problem areas are still muddy but some things never change right?

Friday, May 10, 2019

Beer Friday. Hard Knock Brewery. Sun Up to Sun Down .

We having a Beer Friday done on an actual Friday? Well hold on son. This shit is actually going down.

Wait! What? It's not even a previously written and posted later review? This is actually happening live? Well ladies, gentlemen and transients... Or is it transitioners? Oh damnit! Now I think I insulted the third part of the community. If I can explain myself please... Is it the third part? Is that bad too?

Truth be told. I don't care one way or another. People switching are doing whats best for themselves. Lets leave them be, this includes the left side as much as it does the right.

Hard Knock was established in two-seventeen so it's just an infant in the brewery world. It was established in Black Diamond Alberta. A kickass old Albertan mining town which is brimming with pride. Let's pour some beer.

We poured this into my trusty Park Tool tester mug and a dirty beer filled the glass. It was like tainted ginger ale. A short lived two and a half fingered head made it's presence. Brown sugar was the main bandit when it came to smelling this. Well that and old banana. The old banana smell worried me as I am one of those who believe banana flavouring should not be in any food with the exception of bananas.

Well we tasted it and guess what. Bananas are strong. So I did what any good reviewer did. I kept going. I'm not going to let some bananas ruin the most grandeur Beer Friday that ever was! Hell no!I'm going to climb onto that horse and ride that bad ass into the sunset with my beer stein in my hand.

We tasted it again and well holy crap. I can't...

Sorry Hard Knox. It's not your fault.

This beer gets 0 suds out of 5.

Thursday, May 9, 2019

The Granny Gear World Championships

A recovery ride or just an attempt to get out cause I can? It was more of a feeling of wanting to get that trail euphoria again as I set out to Fort Saskatchewan. The order of the day? Even slower than usual and I kept it in granny gear for the whole ride which honestly started out as a way to relieve very sore muscles and it turned into a game of keeping it in granny gear the whole bike ride.

Oh the weird fun I have on bike rides...

Fort Saskatchewan. A place to ride when everything hurts from riding but you want to keep riding. A fellow rider on the trail scoffed at my admission that I came here to recover sore muscles. I asked him to show me where the hard relentless climbs are (nicely of course) and he could not. I did say things are challenging here but aerobically there are far harder trails to ride in Edmonton.

Am I right? If wrong please send emails cause I really care deeply on this subject.

The trails today were prime and filled me with the euphoria I was searching for. I don't know what it is about this week but the rides have each been absolutely spectacular.

And in the end. I won those Granny Gear world championships.

Wednesday, May 8, 2019

Westbound and Down

A visit to the west end of Edmonton today where a Cameron Heights start was had amid all the white ladies driving S.U.V's or high end mini vans trying to one up each other giving me the stink eye as I had invaded their neighbourhood to start a bike ride.

Bottle Rocket was ridden and I gotta say 'damn... That has turned into one hell of a trail.' If you start at the top by the fence it will not let you down. Singletrack snakes its way through the grass and trees and before you know it you are ripping downhill with the odd beer can greeting you on the end of a branch as you whizz by.

Car parts and an old car greet you along the trail. It does sound a bit trashy but it seems to work with the ambience of the trail. Ladder bridges and built up berms add to the fun. This is exactly what this area needed as the other option is a long paved boring stretch that seems to never end. Which I rode up to finish the ride.

The Staff College climb was ridden and Go Trail. Soon I was in Oliskew and my legs were feeling the affects of two straight days of riding after nothing much in the past few weeks.

The ride home was a bit of a struggle. Sore legs and screaming lungs had wanted nothing to do with bikes and screamed for the couch and an iPad. "Fuck no!" I yelled staying resilient in light of a very difficult situation.

Then came the Go Trail return...

There I was sitting in front of Go Trail's westbound entrance scared if I ride it I may black out from exhaustion and slip into a coma and wake up five years from now to find my wife remarried and my daughters growing quite fondly of the new Dad and forgotten all about me.

A very real fear that almost pushed me onto the multi use.

At once I realized what I was about to do and miss all that heroin inspiring singletrack and I rode Go Trail like a man. Not a little bitch with his tail tucked between his legs. No sir, I will ride like a little bitch tomorrow.

Tuesday, May 7, 2019

Unexpected Awesome

First ride back from work and I was expecting a wet weather ride on multi use and paved to kick things off but once in Mill creek ravine things were quite dry and I knew this was going to be a gooder.

The Moots was the choice in bikes again as the Altitude is undergoing mid life or late in life repairs to make it through the season. The ride was short which is sad cause the conditions today were pure epic. The cold weather and skiffs of light rain reminded me I was in the middle of central northern Alberta in early May. Cause dammit. I'm smart enough to understand the weather we get here. On that note. Fuck you social media, you whiny little bitch.

That feels better.... The legs did give out after taking the lower Ewok river trail (does that one have another name too? Meh, who cares, it will always be lower Ewok to me.) to upper Ewok. Once I was at the bottom after rolling through the amaze that is Holy Trail I knew it was time to head back.

The bike was on point today as well as the trails. The conditions are amazing and with no leaves budding things are incredible for riding right now. So go on... Get out there kids.

potty break along the river(don't freak out, i pointed towards the bushes)