Wednesday, April 14, 2021

Rides on Pavement




 When the highlight of your ride is peeing in a city of Edmonton parking garage chances are my friend that you didn't have a crazy fun ride. I completely blame work as I start another rotation tomorrow and I have been moping around the house just because of it. 

Yes, I can be a real bitch sometimes. This is a real problem and it does affect my mood on the last day. The sadness stems from having to put away the bike and everything else that is fun for a full week. With 14 hour days including travel to and from work there is very little time to do anything. 

The ride is not worth mentioning as it was a very routine roll from Kinseman down bike lanes and paved paths heading downtown. 

We did wimp out when the snow hit us. Not gonna lie. I was all gung ho when it was coming down to do some winter riding but when it came down to it I did not want to deal with the mess and the cold. I had my share of coldness throughout the winter. 

So yes.. Terribly sorry for the lame bike ride and write up. There is a small chance of a ride on Friday as I start this set on days but have to switch to nights which leaves my entire Friday night open. 

Saturday, April 10, 2021

Recon at Home Base





I guess I could call Mill Creek my home base. That isn't stepping on any weird boundaries or crossing any sort of line right? I don't know... I feel like I have to ask. We are in the era of the ultra offended after all.

See, I bet that first quick paragraph offended somebody. 

It was a Velodrome start today with intentions of checking out some singletrack. I soon found myself in Earthshaker and was happy to see everything was top notch. If you are not aware and don't know the area Earthshaker is up in the hills so it dries quicker. Me and my dumb ass just assumed everything was good to ride but quickly ran into some road blocks. Well... Mud blocks. See what I did there? Boom. 

It was in the low spots that I ran into mud and like the genius I was I cancelled any more singletrack excursions because everything is a 'mud pit.' Well for a few kilometres then I woke up. Yes, I felt like that uninformed guy who gets his opinions about the pandemic from Facebook or Twitter and spouts off his opinion ignoring the professionals. 

Well that was a weird tangent now was it? 

I took the outside paved loop from the Low Level westward till I hit the Menzies and crossed back. This was about the time I realized up high singletrack should be fine. I avoided the low Canada Cup trail next to Kinseman cause it's low.

Holy shit guys. I am showing my true genius here.

West Coast trail scared me for some reason and I rode the high sides of the Old Timer trails. Do those other trails have a name? Shocked if they don't. It was a successful skinny bridge crossing and the trees did not take me out. A slight return of pride after having to walk up some greasy root infested hills that I have ridden up in the past.

It was The Trap in Mill Creek where a high number of riders who all looked quite experienced could not communicate one bit and they kept coming... All I wanted to know was how many more after the guy passing? Nope. Not a word. Once the train passed  I scooted home and had a much bigger victory after conquering the climb up Hi Spot. It literally has been a couple years since that has happened. 

All in all, not a bad ride. I was sore from yesterday and had two amazing rides in a row so I felt the cards would not be in my favour. Tomorrow was supposed to be a day off but now I am thinking a fat bike ride. We are getting absolutely hammered right now. Stay tuned. 

why riding through mud is bad, when you don't ride through it but go around. lots of damage there and now those areas are muddied up so people will keep making new paths while destroying the area. this shit drives me nuts

 

Friday, April 9, 2021

Team Mut's and Paved



There it is again, that conspicuous high you get from the high merits rewarded from another top notch bike ride. I really wish you could just feel like this all the time, now wouldn't that be super stellar? Yes,I'm high as hell from riding again. I had this feeling from yesterday's ride only tonight it is a lot stronger. A few more miles were tackled today but they were all mostly paved and as you know paved riding can cover a lot of kilometres in a hurry. 

I departed Fort Edmonton's parking lot with fresh spaghetti stains on my shirt and I am sure a few noodle straddlers caught up in my playoff beard. I went westward with intentions of riding Flat Pete  and looping around and riding directly into Karenville... Gasp! What a crazy fucktard I can be sometimes!

I took the high paved by Fort Edmonton with intentions of making it some sort of figure 8 and riding the multi use on the way back. After crossing Fort Ed. bridge I noticed some heavy mudded sections at the entrance to Flat Pete and I aborted the mission. I stayed on the paved and soon found Oliskew Meadow trail and came across quite a bit of mudded out sections. People had already avoided the area creating tracks all over the place. 

I decided to give up and just ride paved. 

I rode up into the sweet housing of Terwillegar and and rode the multi use along the rivers edge and Fort Edmonton. I stayed true to my plan and tested out the singletrack in Karenville. One of them gave me stink eye as I rolled into the trails...

I crossed and the pedestrian bridge and the multi use of Hawerlak took me out. Soon after some more paved and a bridge crossing I found myself at Ezio Ferone park for a quick coffee break. It was a weird mix of absolute douchebaggery from the men and the women equally. I quickly felt bad for the human race and got the hell out of there. 

The High Level took me across again and it was pretty much downhill all the way back to the Jeep. 

Hellz yeah kids, today was awesome. 

some of the muck in oliskew, yes it could be a lot worse

 

Thursday, April 8, 2021

Beer Friday. Dog Island Brewing, Oilers Nation Beer


 So the Oilers fans have their official beer that has been around since? Ok wait... How long has this been around? Sorry, I don't know much of anything. I do know that former Oiler Andrew Ference was the one behind this as he wanted a beer just for Oiler fans, or at least that's what the internet told me. Internet you say? I don't trust that thing one bit. 

But hey... Andre Ference is a cool guy, he rides bikes now doesn't he? That in my book makes one quite cool. He does ride mainly road and apparently is one of them stair runners in the river valley that we see while we are cruising around the valley's sweet singletrack. 

Dog House Brewing located in Slave Lake has been open since twenty sixteen. The year Donald Trump took office in the United States white house. It's funny, that seems so innocent compared to things now. 

This is apparently the beer specifically made just for Oiler fans. My first question was 'why is it a light beer? Weird..' If you haven't been around here during the playoffs or at any Oiler game it would appear that Oiler fans like to get drunk. Well white girl wasted drunk. 

Hold on... I'm talking about sports fans here. This applies to pretty much all of them. 

So lets go to the pour. Was this one brewed with Ryan Smyth's sweat and tears? Will see. 

So we poured this one and it gave me what I thought it would. Until I took a second look. this was not your typical light pilsner pour. It has a murky dark undertone to this one and I am intrigued. It looks almost chalky. A small head stayed for a while and left us some pretty sweet lacing in it's wake. The nostrils were taken aback with malt and light corn as we tried to get this faintly odoured beer figured out. 

We tasted and were pleasantly happy with the outcome. Would this suffice one of those knuckle dragging morons who phone in to the local am sports shows with their Oilers opinions every night? Most likely not, but fuck those losers. For a light beer it is better than I expected. Although I won't be writing letters to long lost family member about this one. Mild hops take do not take you to flavourtown (*copyright, Guy Fieri.) It's hard to discern a true taste to this, I keep wanting to type out green grape but don't feel like I should put it in here. Wait.. Oh well.

If you are an Oiler fan, You must get this if you already haven't. It's hockey beer, the 'light ' factor does not make sense though for hockey fans in northern Canada.

This beer gets 2.5 suds out of 5.



Wednesday, April 7, 2021

Short and Spectacular





This may be the one that signals the shaving of the playoff beard. A real winner of a ride with Kent to kick off days off. 

Days off that were supposed to start two days ago but due to unfortunate circumstances I had to work a full week. Well... Except I left early to go for a bike ride cause Momma didn't raise no fool. 

It was Cameron Heights that kicked it off and I took paved and multi use to meet him in Terwillegar where the ugly statues reside. From there we backtracked my route only on singletrack that is sooooo close to being 100% ready. All the usuals were ridden up into the hills where we found Go Trail eventually. 

Things are opening up and Good Lord it's early. 

That being said there are still patches of shit leftover but very minimal so if you come across any please do the right thing. We would hate to dispatch the Lonebiker thugs out your way to give you a little bit of some rough business if you know what I mean. 

We crossed the Henday and rode Coyote and Bottle Rocket which were all in good condition. Bottle Rocket is insane fun and I was reminded that I should come out this way more.

it's an unwritten rule if you park here to ride paved you don't enter, you go up the road....

this is where you start kids, ebikes and segways start at the fence

*Photo credit, Kent Steeves #1 & 3

Wednesday, March 31, 2021

Puddle Jumping



A final ride for days off which had to be done given the crappy state of rides whilst on days off. 

It was a classic Mill Creek start on an all paved route which was extremely busy for a Wednesday afternoon. Than you covid and spring break.

The highlight was obviously riding the Moots again. Going from shit bike to Moots is a nice switch this time of year.

It was Mill Creek out and across the river on Edmonton's most boring bridge, the James Mcdonald. Well the Henday bridges are pretty crappy but they have that cool crossing for bikes below. The James Mcdonald is just a sad state of affairs when it comes to cool bridges in the city. I know this cause I never see Instagrammers hanging out with their phones trying to get the perfect shot. 

Unlike the new Walterdale...

The ride was top notch despite being super tired trying to switch back to days as it all starts again tomorrow, with Easter happening I will be off two days early which makes next set off a nine day set off of pure awesome. I really hope we make the best use of it.

I flirted with riding downtown for a bit but retreated back across the mighty Menzies and up into the urban jungle for a ride along Saskatchewan drive when the 76 ave bike lane took me pretty close to my Jeep. 

don't be this guy... please. probably filling up his instagram with how hardcore he is meanwhile causing havoc across the valley creating ruts and other bullshit, i say guy because no female would ever do this

be like this guy. steven wolf donated a gps to the lb foundation in exchange for a few beers, win win. yes i finally remember to bring it, a strong way to finish this night set off

Rides on Pavement

 When the highlight of your ride is peeing in a city of Edmonton parking garage chances are my friend that you didn't have a crazy fun r...