Friday, February 14, 2014

When Rides End in Bonk, They Were Delicious



Sorry folks, there will be no scantly clad photos of me getting it on with one of my bikes this year. I chose to ride on this so called holiday that helps flower stores and chocolate shops pay the rent for the year. A so called holiday where certain women say they don't give a jack shit about yet still get quite upset when they don't get anything. Yes I think chicks be crazy, which is why I love riding bikes and ride I did today.

A ride from Henrietta Louise (Edmonton Queen) to Quesnell bridge with some temptations to push to Fort Edmonton bridge, and back on the North Side. I started to ride into Fort Edmonton Park to get to the bridge but turned away as the cold in the morning was quite harsh and I was feeling it. Or was it the strong gravitational pull of the Talus dome that pulled me back sucking me in like a redneck white trash  mom going into a Wal Mart McDonald's. I was truly excited to see the balls again (don't take that phrase the wrong way internet) and it showed as I took a selfie with my phone all proud in front when I realised there were two ladies coming up the stairs getting a good laugh at what they were witnessing. I don't care, the Talus dome is freakin awesome.

Once on the North side in Laurier Park the cold was biting hard and I couldn't find a place to warm up. I rode into the dog park where immediately a giant German Shepherd chased me barking like a fool and tried nipping at my heels while the old lady owner watched and did nothing. "Oh how fucking cute this is!" I bellowed to the clueless owner. Once out of range of idiot dog and idiot woman I was attacked again by some other guys shitty dog. He smiled and seemed to enjoy the show. I kindly told him to go fuck himself. We both felt good in the end. The enragement I incurred did warm me up but I took refuge in Hawerlak's skating shack before crossing the river again to keep my North side return home momentum up. I was fine until I reached the High Level Bridge where I sat underneath and wondered how I would make it back to Mill Creek as I had bonked in a big way. I quickly remembered I wasn't parked at Mill Creek but at the Queen which was a mere stone throws away on a bike, so I pressed on and made it home.

happy happy, joy joy, talus dome you the greatest
an awe inspiring place to hang out and take in the views
my gps rode home here, this is me getting lucky on valentines day